The Terrible Tale of Tiaan CONradie: The Lying Dutchman

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This has not been a pleasant article to write. I knew Tiaan when I first started running in the early 2000s. He managed the Fourways Runner at the time, we both ran for Fourways Road Runners and he seemed like a “good guy”. Although we did not train for the race together, we both ran our first sub-3 marathon at Kaapsehoop in 2008 (and Tiaan featured in my race report). Tiaan has 19 Comrades finishes to his name including 3 silvers with a best time of 7:11:10 in 2012. He was an excellent runner and was perfectly entitled to give himself the moniker “The Flying Dutchman” (or TFD for short). Unfortunately, it turns out that he is also a master con artist and the “The Lying Dutchman” would have been much more appropriate.

When I got a message from a running friend asking, “Do you know Tiaan Conradie? I think he’s scammed us for shoes”, I was sceptical – surely there must be some kind of explanation. A couple of weeks later I received a similar message from a second running friend asking if I could apply my investigative skills to one Tiaan Conradie aka The Flying Dutchman. The result is this article and the hope that it will prevent others from getting caught in similar scams.

Tiaan Conradie, who likes to go by the moniker The Flying Dutchman or TFD, will happily rob you of the shirt off your back and give you kudos on Strava afterwards.
Continue reading “The Terrible Tale of Tiaan CONradie: The Lying Dutchman”
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MadMac Marathon (a cure for coulrophobia)

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Between Comrades and Two Oceans, I have spent a lot of time this year writing about clowns. You could say I was acquiring a severe case of coulrophobia – which is of course the fear of clowns. However, I seem to have developed a unique strain called antici-coulrophobia – which is a fear about what the aforementioned clowns will do or say next (and then I have to spend a great deal of time writing about it).

Fortunately, I was confident that I could find a 100% successful cure for extreme antici-coulrophobia by facing my fears head on and self-medicating at the clown-themed MadMac Marathon. The theme was chosen as the race venue is the site of the old Boswell Wilkie Circus in Randvaal and there is still plenty of circus apparatus and remnants of the now defunct circus around.

Fitting right in: Julian Karp has promised to dye his hair for next year’s race.
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LetsGo Potch Marathon (searching for pots, chefs & strooms)

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[MARATHON #253 / UNIQUE MARATHON #150 / 28 OCTOBER 2023]

Although it was mid-term school break, I could not sell a weekend away in Potchefstroom to my teenage daughters. Therefore, I did the short trip along the N12 from Joburg solo. Two hours later I was in the North West province and checked into my accommodation for the night – an establishment called Beesdam. I had chosen it for proximity to the start which would allow me a slightly longer sleep the following morning. Potchefstroom is a university town and my room was adjacent to the main campus entrance. When booking, I noted that one of the rooms offered a “studding” desk – things have certainly changed since I was a student.

Upon arrival I settled into a beer and a few Friday afternoon emails whilst watching the Proteas cruising to victory against Pakistan and gloatingly posted to our family WhatsApp group about “enjoying the bachelor life”. I made the 500m stroll down the road to registration, which was friendly and efficient, hoping that Markram and Miller would wait for my return before knocking off the winning runs.

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Sedibeng Marathon (Getting down & dirty in the Vaal Triangle)

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[MARATHON #235 / Unique Marathon #135 / 8 December 2019]

Running a marathon in the Vaal Triangle for the views, is like watching a porno for the storyline.

As they say in the classics, “Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes”. I’m not one to judge anyone for what they do in the privacy of their own home – and you shouldn’t judge those who choose to run in the Vaal Triangle (not until you’ve run a marathon in their shoes anyway)! And speaking of classics, Debbie might already have done Dallas – but Stuart still needed to strut around Sedibeng.  Continue reading “Sedibeng Marathon (Getting down & dirty in the Vaal Triangle)”

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Loskop Marathon (The one with a late start & a fast finish)

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[Marathon #214 / 11th Loskop Ultra Marathon / 6 April 2019]

It is rather perturbing to wake up at the feet of Dawn* for one of your favourite ultra marathons and find that there is a 4am text message saying, “URGENT NOTICE: Due to public violence en-route both race starts will be delayed by AT LEAST an HOUR – Police are evaluating the situation. Next update 5:00”. Continue reading “Loskop Marathon (The one with a late start & a fast finish)”

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Surrender Hill Marathon (Overdosing on Maluti Muti)

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[Marathon #208 / Unique Marathon #118 / 2 March 2019]

One of my wild running ideas is to pick the best and most beautiful small-town marathons from all around the South Africa and create a ‘Hidden Gems’ series – the objective being to add a finish at each one to your lifetime marathon running CV. It’s still very much in the formulative stage but I would ensure that there is at least one race per province.

There are so many great small-town marathons scattered all over our beautiful country that whittling the list down to a manageable size, say a dozen, is going to be a challenge. However, I expected a bigger challenge to be finding a Free State marathon that meets my stringent selection criteria. Although there are many great Free State runs, ‘beautiful’ is not adjective one readily associates with their routes.

Nevertheless, as an optimist by nature, I held out hope that a hidden gem could still be unearthed in the Free State. Many marathons ago, I got chatting to some runners from Bethlehem (if memory serves me correctly it was one wise man and two wise women) who told me of a neighbouring town called Clarens and a marathon called Surrender Hill. Continue reading “Surrender Hill Marathon (Overdosing on Maluti Muti)”

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